Life + Death

My heart is heavy today as I write this. We know a couple who just had a son. He was their first full-term pregnancy. During the pregnancy, it was discovered that part of his brain and skull were missing. So, we started praying, along with many others, for a miracle. Most of the time, these babies are born stillborn. Well, he was born alive on Saturday, which was a miracle! We continued to pray and yesterday, 23 hours later, he went to be with Jesus. I don't know why. I'm not going to point fingers at God because He didn't answer the way I wanted Him to. This couple's faith has been so strong and trusting in the Lord the whole time. They have been an incredible testimony to those around them. I don't see the big picture, so I don't know why God says yes sometimes and not other times. I know that He is still good and still sovereign. I know that the baby is totally healed now and he will never know pain + suffering on this earth. Jesus will hold him until they get to meet him again. It really puts things into perspective for me as we've had ongoing problems we've been dealing with, but they're really teeny tiny compared to what this couple is going through. Yes, Kiera threw a huge, long tantrum last night when it was time for bed, but she is alive and well, so who cares! Yes, Blake gets into EVERYTHING these days and keeps me incredibly busy, but again, he's alive and healthy, so those things aren't a big deal! I would encourage you to hug your family members or friends today and thank God that they're alive. He has each of our days numbered and I trust that He knows best. I don't want to die yet, but I'm really looking forward to spending forever with Jesus where there is no more pain, no more suffering, no more sickness and no more tears!

The Kids Lately

Recently, Kiera’s favorite movie is Veggie Tales “Silly Songs.”  Her favorite song on there is “I Can Be Your Friend,” which she likes to sing throughout the day, especially at suppertime.  It often gets stuck in my head and Jared’s as well.  Blake eats about twice as much as Kiera and twice as fast, too.  Sometimes he eats as much as Jared!  It’s crazy, as he’s not nearly a teenager yet, and interesting to see the differences between the 2 kids.

I’m trying to keep track of the new things Blake is doing and saying.  Not only has he learned to walk, he can now walk backward, too.  I also started praying that he would be able to go up and down the stairs by himself since Kiera often ends up leaving the basement door open.  Going up was no problem, but he didn’t know how to go down.  It wasn’t long after I started praying about it and he learned to go down backward on his tummy!  He says “Unt” (out) when he wants to come out of his high chair.  He has “a da” (all done) when he’s finished eating.  He says/sings, “Up a ba ba” (Up above the…) when he wants you to sing “Twinkle Twinkle Little Star” (that’s the beginning of the 3rd line).  He is learning to use plastic spoons and forks and feeds himself oatmeal with a bit of brown sugar + cinnamon in it every morning for breakfast.  He usually manages to smear it all over his face + hair, too.  He pats his chest when he wants something, which means please.  He says “babby” which is baby.  He also figured out how to open the dishwasher, which Kiera has never even tried to do! It’s fun watching him learn new things and I LOVE that he’s starting to communicate with words!  Did anyone think the picture in this post is Blake?  It’s Jared’s baby picture.  Just in case you’re wondering who he looks like, it’s pretty obvious! :)  Here are 2 short videos of Blake dancing and walking!

A Warm Bowl of Soup on a Cold Winter Day

I had a couple of friends request on Facebook that I start posting my recipes on my blog.  So, in case you’re wondering what I’ve been eating or looking for some new recipes, I will be putting them on here maybe once a week or so.  I make my own soup for lunch almost every day and one of my favorite ones so far has been this one.  I can’t say that I absolutely love broccoli, but I love this recipe!

Cream of Broccoli Soup

-1 onion, chopped (I don’t like onions, but I like green onions in little pieces, so that’s what I used)

-1 clove garlic (I just did 1 tsp. garlic powder)

-3 cups chicken broth

-1 stalk celery, diced

-3 cups chopped broccoli (you could also cook the vegetables separately and then put them in the blender if you want a thicker soup)

-1 tsp. basil

-Pepper to taste

 

Cook separately:

-2 tbsp. butter (I used olive oil)

-3 tbsp. flour (I used white rice flour)

-2 cups milk (I used almond milk)

Bring those 3 ingredients to a boil so it forms a roux (a thick sauce), then add it to the soup.  Voila!  You could also add cheese to it, as cheese makes almost everything more tasty.  I’m not sure yet if I can eat cheese.  I’m planning to try this week and I pray it goes well!

Thankfully, Blake usually naps around lunchtime, so that frees me up to cut up all the vegetables for my soups during that time, as it can be time-consuming.  I don’t really like vegetables, but I’ve actually really been enjoying them in my soups!

Still Counting in the New Year

This year, I’m continuing toward my goal of 1000 things (and more) that I’m thankful for, so here is my continued list:

571. That God is in control when there are unexpected vehicle repairs and house repairs

572. That Jared + I got to watch a movie together (Love Happens) and that except for a few words, it was clean!

573. Cute pictures that make me laugh

574. Apple butter

575. Skor blizzards (yes, I cheated)

576. Band-aids in funny places

577. When Blake sleeps in (a rare occasion, unlike Kiera)

578. For getting up with enough time to work out, read the Bible, and blog before the kids are up

579. Kiera’s new favorite “outfit”

580. For new soup recipes that I found online

581. Friends and family who pray for me whenever I ask (and maybe when I don’t ask)

582. My friend who helped me do my nails, which I haven’t done in years!  It was fun to hang out and do something girly like that!

583. For Skype, which I just signed up for last week

584. For a friend who gave us a webcam for free because she didn’t need it anymore!

585. For talking to my sister + brother-in-law for over an hour on Skype on Saturday and they were able to see Blake walk for the first time

586. Eating breakfast together as a family

587. Kiera’s loud songs + dancing that she entertained Art + Jenene with

588. That my niece or nephew is due in exactly 2 months from this week!

589. For Jared, who takes out the garbage + recycling every week

590. The all-natural Vanilla + Sweet Orange shampoo I got for Christmas

The Experiment Begins

I got a call from the Naturopath doctor yesterday and my stool tests came back all negative! Praise the Lord! They still don't know what's wrong, though. She asked if I knew of anything for sure that my body doesn't like and I said, "Corn and high amounts of corn starch." She said to stay on the diet and then if I've had a good week, to try a food that I'm not supposed to have and see what my body does. I'm supposed to keep a detailed food journal of what I've eaten and how my body felt and I'm meeting with her in 4 weeks to discuss it. I'm praying the list of foods my body doesn't like will be very short. This morning, I put maple syrup on my buckwheat + rice flour pancakes, so I have already started the experiment. On a side note, it was so great to actually talk to the doctor instead of the receptionist! With medical doctors, that rarely ever happens.

I have also discovered in my research that corn is hidden in SO many foods. I found out that baking powder is made from corn. How do you bake without baking powder? Put in half the amount of baking soda and a tiny bit of vinegar and it works perfectly! You would never be able to tell! The first ingredient of my egg substitute is corn starch, so for every egg in a recipe, you just add one tbsp of olive oil instead. Again, it works great! I'm so thankful that there are so many substitutes and alternatives.

Here are a couple of short videos of the kids, just because I haven't put any on here in a while! The first one is from October and the 2nd one is from November.

Fasting + Praying

Every year, our church does 3 weeks of prayer and fasting in January. I made a prayer list of things I want to seriously pray about on a regular basis and one of the things on the list was Blake deciding to walk. He's been sort of walking for quite a while, but always just between 2 people. As long as there was someone to meet him on the other side, he would walk. Well, I only started to seriously pray about it for 5 days when he started walking all on his own this past Friday! Praise God for answered prayer! I am THRILLED that he's 14 months and walking and not waiting 'til 19 months like Kiera did. Each child is different and each has different giftings.

Last year, I fasted dessert, which was fine for the most part until we had Jared's work holiday party. They always have a buffet and then tables FULL of dessert. So, I missed out on all the amazing sweet things. This year, I decided to not do a food fast and God told me to fast from reading books (except the Bible), since my strict diet isn't for fasting purposes. I was really sad that I would possibly have to miss out on the dessert again at Jared's work holiday party, but then decided I would be strict all week and then cheat this past Saturday. It was worth every single delicious bite, and there were many bites! During supper, I more or less behaved and had potatoes, broccoli, salad, and then one little meatball and a bit of lasagna (SO good)! Then I ate dessert and more dessert! There was cherry cheesecake, layered cakes, nanaimo bars, tarts, a chocolate fountain with fruit, and other things I'm forgetting. I tried some of each! I did pay for it last night, but today I'm feeling great again! God spoke to me and promised healing to me, so that was really encouraging! I'm still going to stay on this diet and maybe God will use that to heal me, but either way, my hope is ultimately in Him. On a side note, we went to the party with 2 other couples we're friends with and had a great time! We rarely get to go out with friends without kids, so that was a treat! I'm so thankful my parents are willing babysitters!

Another answer to prayer was when we were leaving church on Sunday. I gave Kiera plenty of warning before we were leaving and told her if she left nicely, she could pick a sticker for her chart when we got home. This time, it worked! It was so wonderful to be able to leave with a quiet kid! That was God's grace! It's not hard to find miracles, big and small, once you start looking for them! :)

Family Update

You've heard a lot recently about me + my health issues, but not a lot about my other family members. They are all doing well. :) Jared is starting another course now (Business Law) and he's doing it distance, which means he'll do it all from home instead of driving to a class. At work, he just had a pile of new work added to his current work load and some of the things he was doing he won't be doing anymore as there are some changes in his work department. So far, that's going well.

Kiera is continuing to learn more songs and remember more + more peoples' names. Recently, she has been having a hard time when we want to leave a place to come home and has been throwing HUGE fits, which is frustrating and embarrassing, so that has been added to my prayer list. She enjoys watching Veggie Tales and knows almost all the words to all the songs and she likes watching Winnie the Pooh clips on YouTube. I do limit the amount she watches every day, but she really enjoys those. A new activity that she enjoys is being in the shower, but not getting her head all wet. She just loves standing there and getting her hands + feet wet and putting soap on her body. She says some of the funniest things and she makes life very interesting!

Blake is over 14 months old now. He still doesn't have a lot of words in his vocabulary, but he understands quite a bit. My favorite word of his is "apple" which sounds more like "appoo." He'll point to one and say it over and over which makes me laugh. He can climb on + off the couch by himself, although sometimes we still have to remind him to climb down backwards and then he goes onto his stomach and does it right away! I also started to pray more about his walking. He has the physically ability, as he has shown us, but just has to decide he wants to. This week, he has been walking more and more on his own, so God is obviously at work! He usually prefers to just hold on to one of my fingers and walk around. He could do that for very long stretches of time, which I try not to get annoyed about since it's hard to get anything else done. I remind myself that when he's 13 years old, he's not going to want to hold my hand all the time and I need to enjoy it while it lasts! He probably won't always be a clingy Mama's boy and I do pray that he will gradually learn to be more independent. I know he's still young and everyone tells me this phase goes by quickly, but it's still been challenging for me at times. I find every age has its great things and its challenges. Now you're all updated, so I'm going to go make lunch!

December Blessings

“The more I count these blessings, the more I realize that they really are not the product of my own efforts. They are truly gifts of grace from God above. It’s incredible to open my eyes to them week after week. And humbling. That I should be graced with such wonders? Me… whose heart is weak and black, yet covered with much mercy. How great is Your unfailing love, Lord God of all!” ~Sharaya Crossan

Looking back over the year, God has used counting my blessings to change my life!  I would say if I could sum up last year in one word, it would be thankfulness.  Yes, there were many moments that I didn’t have a thankful heart, but thankfully there were also many that I did.  This year, the word God has given me is “trust.”  That one for me isn’t a feel good one like love or joy or thanks because it implies that circumstances won’t always be the way I want, but I need to trust God because He is in control and has a good plan!  I will continue to give thanks, so here is my continued list:

555. That our Christmas gatherings were a bit more spread out this year

556. That Blake has started to walk on his own at 13 months old (he’s not completely yet), 5 months sooner than his sister

557. The warm slippers I got for Christmas

558. Bundled up cuteness

559. That my parents took Blake for the night on New Year’s Eve so we could stay out late with Kiera at our friends’ house

560. When Blake has a phone, he puts it to his ear and says, “How?”

561. Traction control

562. Discovering Nana’s lipstick

563. Talking to my sister on the phone (that doesn’t happen very often)

564. Non-wheat flours

565. Almond milk

566. When Kiera has fun playing, even when she makes a big mess

567. Olive oil

568. Homemade soup

< p>569. Prayer

570. That I have legs that can walk!

Big Improvements!!

Since Monday, my body has done a 180 and I would say that things are basically back to normal! Praise the Lord! I haven't felt this good since October when this whole thing started. I can't say I'm absolutely loving this diet, but I love how I'm feeling! I don't know if or when I'll be able to add other foods back in, but I know that I need to keep making healthier choices and keep eating fruits + vegetables instead of just loading up on the carbs. I made my own pancakes this morning and ate them with homemade strawberry jam. I can't say they were amazing, but they were alright. Instead of flour, milk, and eggs, I used buckwheat flour, almond milk, and an egg substitute which comes in a powder form and then you just add water (I know, kind of weird). I'll probably try them with applesauce, too. I think they would be good with Nutella, but Nutella has skim milk powder in it, so I did find a dairy-free recipe for Nutella. Not sure if I'll do that, but at least the option is there. I'm looking forward to making my own mashed potatoes with almond milk next week and I found a tomato rice side dish at the store that I can eat, since I'm getting tired of eating rice with olive oil + spices. Olive oil + spices have become my new best friends! I made my own salad dressing (kind of like Italian dressing) using olive oil, vinegar, and spices because almost all salad dressings have soybean oil in them. I also made my own soup yesterday using vegetable broth, carrots, celery, rice, parsley, basil, salt, and pepper. It was pretty good and Blake even ate the veggies from it! Kiera won't eat veggies, so I'm thrilled that Blake does (sometimes). I got this idea originally from a friend and then was reminded of it by my Aunt who has a cookbook about how to hide vegetables in food. I cooked carrots, blended them up with water and then divided them into ziploc bags and put them in the freezer. I made pasta noodles with sauce for my family yesterday and added in a bag of blended up carrots and nobody noticed! HA! It worked! I'm also going to do cauliflower, too. Yay for healthy tricks! I'm SO thankful that I'm healthy again, not just for my own sake, but for the sake of my family, too. Everything is more difficult when you're not feeling well, as most of you know from the vicious flu + colds that have been going around. I'm also getting a break from Kiera today as she went to her grandparents' for today until tomorrow! Her behavior hasn't been great lately, so a little break is very nice! I'll leave you with a couple of short videos from our Christmas.

Starting the New Year In a Battle

I went to the Naturopath doctor last week Thursday and she was really nice.  I’m going to get my stool tested, which isn’t fun.  It’s like playing with your poop, smearing it and putting it in different containers.  Anyway, along with that, I got put on fairly strict diet, which I expected would happen. 

Things I Can’t Eat:

-Wheat or anything containing gluten

-Anything with soy

-Peanuts + peanut butter

-Red meat, deli meats, and canned meats

-Anything with dairy or eggs

-Margarine, butter, mayonnaise

-Pop, alcohol, coffee

-Chocolate, ketchup, bbq sauce, all other condiments

-White or brown sugar, honey, syrup

 

Things I Can Eat:

-All fruits except oranges

-All fruit juices except orange juice

-All vegetables except corn or anything creamed

-Rice, oats, anything made with rice flour, millet, buckwheat

-Potatoes

-Almonds, cashews

-Chicken, turkey, lamb, fresh, frozen, or canned fish

-Rice milk, almond milk, coconut milk, egg substitutes

-Olive oil, canola oil, flaxseed oil, sesame oil

-Water, decaf herbal tea

-Vinegar, all spices including salt

 

It’s a daily battle for me to not be jealous of most other people who can eat all kinds of food that I can’t.  I’ve also been concerned that friends + family aren’t going to want to have us over, especially for a meal, with my strict diet.  I know it’s such a stupid thing to be concerned about, but those relationships are really important to me.  I’ve been bringing my own snacks with me when we go out in the evenings and that’s been good.  I was sitting and praying about it this morning and God spoke to me and I just started crying.  He told me He already knew this was going to happen and He wants to use it to increase my faith.  It’s a mental battle as much as it is a physical one, to turn my worries over to Him every day, multiple times a day, while not knowing what’s wrong and not knowing if something can or will fix it.  I know I can trust Him and every day I pray for healing.  I REALLY don’t want this to be a very long-term thing.  He knows.  If you think of me, I wouldn’t mind some prayers! :)

I’ve been on this diet for 4 days and for the most part, I feel better.  It had gotten to the point where I felt gross almost all the time and I would eat 3 bites of food and then would have to stop because I felt so gross.  I often couldn’t even finish a meal or sometimes even half a meal.  I also had stomach pain.  Now, my appetite is back to normal and most of the time, I feel good.  My main symptom, though, has not improved.  I still have much to be thankful for.  My Grandma is on an even stricter diet, plus she has to put anything she eats into the blender first.  We never have to look far to find someone going through much worse.  I was reminded of this verse today: Romans 8:18 “I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us.”  I have an eternity of perfect health to look forward to!  That may not change my symptoms right now, but it sure does change my perspective!